Waiting, not so patiently.

Valentines day is going to suck no mater how hard I try to focus on the positive.  That’s what happens when you find your husband’s Skypes with his mistress and read through most of them.  It doesn’t bother me that they are together this year but I keep thinking about the Skypes I read from last February about the lingerie he purchased her.  The wife didn’t even get a card last year and I also didn’t know about her until August and that was last February. Then of course tonight I get the final papers to sign so they can be sent to the judge, but the kicker it stated it would be another 6 to 8 weeks before it will be absolutely final.  Yeah happy valentines day.  I guess it was more than I got last year and it is good to know there will be an end.  Glad that I have a few bottles of wine on hand. Seriously Saint Valentine if you don’t come up with an amazing 2013 I will come after your adorable little cherub ass.  I was getting excited about dating and started checking guys out (even outside of my yoga classes).  Even purchasing speed dating tickets for myself and a very supportive and brave friend.  I know I don’t have to wait, obviously he never did, but I really don’t want to go on a date holding his last name.  That’s right little mistress Racheal I am still his wife, I still hold his name but I can’t wait for you to fully win every part of him, sweetie you deserve it.  I really wanted to be the amazing person who can put it all behind them and not look back.  Hell I feel like I am handling it all pretty well, I am not in rehab like Demi and didn’t go after him with a golf club like Elin.  I wish I could channel my inner Sandra or Aniston and be above it all, but the news of 6 to 8 more weeks is aggravating.  Maybe if I wasn’t lied to and manipulated for who knows how long, I could be above it.  But since I am not, they don’t get a free pass without consequences and it will be fun to remind them.  I am sure a few glasses of wine will illicit an appropriate and momentous tweet.  Phew, already feeling better after this ridiculous emotional rant.  Obviously I am not that excited about the manufactured holiday but I do love, love.  The moments that make your heart lurch, butterflies fill your tummy, weak knees and smiles bigger than a canyon.   Happy Valentines Day to those who are truly in love and don’t cheat.