It’s officially over signed and sealed by a California judge. I happened to be on vacation in Palm Springs with some girlfriends and it could not have been a better time. I had given the legal team my parents address for written communication as when I moved back in September I had no idea where I would land. After a few days by the pool, sunshine, good food, drinks and a great day of shopping my mom called to let me know there was a large white envelope from the State of California. I told her to open it and there it was all signed. To put into words my ecstatic and jubilant moment, does not do it justice. I am still smiling ear to ear. I can’t thank the girls enough for celebrating one of the most important and delightful moments in my life. It was a million times better then being a teenager and freaking over NKOTB and scaling a fence at the Puyallup fair to see their sound check. In the weeks leading up to the end, I was apprehensive about this moment. The entirety of this ordeal, the dissolution of my marriage, has been volatile and erratic with emotion for months. Would I be sad, angry, pained, dejected, or irritated? I was utterly elated. If someone would have told me it would be even better then the moment Donnie Wahlberg pulled me out of an audience at the mall to sing cover girl to me, I know I would not have believed it. Maybe the enlightened moment in my life will be this one, the eradication of malevolence. The journey was one I had to experience on my own with the amazing support of family and incredible friends. Thanks to all of you who have sent your kind words in my moments of despair and encouraged my integrity in those flickers of weakness. It is weird to feel so much from just a signature on a piece of paper, I am not sure what it says about me that I couldn’t let go until it was signed and recognized by a court, for me tangible and real. I shouldn’t say let go, I immediately let go upon the discovery of the affair. I moved states and started a new life and ceased all communication between us. We were as separated as two people could be but there was a legal thread that linked us together. On the flip side, many people say marriage is just a piece of paper, it’s truly how you live and share your lives but there was something in those short vows for me, something in that commitment, the signed certificate that I believed in the tradition of marriage. That piece of paper meant something special to me and I never knew divorce papers would be just as special. Now onto living a full life of honesty, integrity and still believing in love. Not a teenage Donnie Wahlberg or Taylor Lautner crush or a false love built on years of lies. Onto true man crushes….Gerard Butler Palm Springs was magical. So what if he had no idea I was at the same bar. Walking down the path of dissolution and experiencing it fully with every high and low has lead me to ultimate freedom. Welcome back Melissa, welcome back.
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