I saw that quote on a bumper sticker the other day and laughed out loud, no shit. I started to think about our financial life together. I have always been okay with money, don’t get me wrong I don’t have a lot but what I do have I worked hard for. We never had a joint bank account or really mixed funds but we never discussed a monthly detailed budget or most of our finances. We should have been partners in all financial matters. I guess it’s hard to hide gifts or hotels for a mistress when the wife has access to the accounts, hunh. For all of our relationship I made more money than he did but for the first few years we went “dutch” and each paid half. When we moved to Vermont and bought a house together this changed. I was making more and he told me he could only pay a portion and not half, okay no problem we were engaged at that point, I thought together for life. In desperation to be the greatest fiancé/wife I wanted to create a comfortable home, I purchased almost all of our household goods. Okay makes sense, but then came the day he bought a motorcycle. He couldn’t contribute half because of his lack of income comparatively and child support but he could afford a motorcycle and the insurance to go with it. That year our property taxes were doubled, my salary cut due to the economy and I was having trouble making ends meet for us. There was that bike in the garage laughing at me everyday. I was pissed and it sparked quite a few good fights between us. Looking back I should have realized, it was all about him and would always be about him, never us. I wonder now what girl he was trying to impress or maybe he might have met someone who had a bike herself. He always complained of his funds being tight and with those types of decisions and the girls on the side, they must have been. When I left I just wanted to get away from him as quickly as possible and was ready to work four shifts at McDonalds in order to make that happen. I was lucky financially that I could leave. If I was under a different circumstance, I would have fought for what I should have been entitled to. All I really got was a moving van he funded and he took eight years of my life. It equated to $500 a year for my love and loyalty as girlfriend, fiancé and wife. After all of this you might think my heart is cold but it’s really my ass. I bought a new car while he was having his affair and because I didn’t know, I thought I would be in LA for years to come. I didn’t go with the seat warmer option. It’s getting cold up here in Seattle and he should have paid for heated seats to get installed. As a gift I paid for our vacation in Costa Rica in May. Now I understand why he was so upset that the Internet connectivity was intermittent, it disrupted his Skype’s with her on the vacation, I took him on. I definitely deserve my money back from that. What about all the money he spent on the girl or girls and maybe I should have been reimbursed for all the money I spent on his daughter. Or better yet he should have paid me a nannies salary for all those hours I took care of his daughter. The wedding should have been refunded, the commitments he spoke of were already being broken and promises thwarted. His secret malicious actions ticked away my fertile years and has possibly jeopardized my dream of having children. What he ultimately should pay for is freezing my eggs. Although that would mean he would have a thread still attached to my dream by funding it. Insert scissors here. There is no part of my dreams he can be attached to and my funds will no longer support his double life. A woman is not a financial plan, either. At least this one won’t be, again.
No comments:
Post a Comment